Do you ever feel that something bigger is calling out to you? Do you feel how it aches in your soul and twists your guts around? I feel it, too. The universe flows through each one of us, giving us each something bigger to be drawn to. It’s vastness awaits us. We are the stuff of stars- the stuff of God.
Though this is true, the universe often has its own plans and ways. We long to learn wisdom, love, acceptance, and the ways of life, but the universe will teach us lessons in its own way. And usually not in the way we expect. How do we navigate these trials and ever changing paths?
Trust. I trust in the plans set out for me and find comfort in the fact that everything always works out the way it’s supposed to in its own timing. For those that don’t remember, our travels came to an abrupt stop in January due to unforeseen circumstances. The other morning I said to Staford, “What was this all for? This was supposed to be something bigger.” With love
and tenderness he replied, “This is something bigger. All of this. We’ve had life changing experiences. We’ve grown as people. We’ve grown as partners. And I’ve learned things that I’ll take with me forever.” I had so much fear of the unknown (because things didn’t go my way) that I didn’t realize life was teaching me its most valuable lessons right here and now.
Throughout this strange time in our lives I’ve continued to journal out my thoughts. I had written things that hurt my heart: “I feel like a loser.” “I feel like I’ve failed.” “What am I doing with my life?” But it’s not true. None of that is true. There is always hope to be had and happiness to be found. Just because I don’t have the answers doesn’t mean I have failed.
I hadn’t posted since January because part of me felt that I had nothing to write about. But I do. We are going through things that a lot of people don’t want to talk about on social media: setbacks, financial issues, and disappointment. I want to be totally transparent in our traveling journey so that others can see it wasn’t a straight path. It had many twists and turns.
Recently Staford and I both took work close to home so that we could get back on our feet and have the support of our family. For now, we are going to travel part-time in our van (any chance we get). We are also focusing on things such as passive income, opening up our own shops, and fixing up a rental property that we own. And I am proud of us for pushing forward! I continue to seek guidance. I keep trusting. I accept that things will continually grow and change. And now, as the world is in the midst of so much sorrow, war, and fear, I count my blessings that my problems are so small compared to others. It will fall into place. Keep on doing what you’re doing, and thanks for reading Into Nature. Come back next week to read about our weekend camping trip in Arkansas!
The mystery of life isn’t a problem to solve, but a reality to experience.Frank Herbert
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